Ponderings

A couple things have crossed my mind lately about parenting.

Number one, where is the line that separates teaching your child your beliefs versus brainwashing them? This is a tough question. I don't want to raise my son to be close minded at all, but I have a responsibility to teach him my beliefs. Especially since my wife and I believe that faith will lead him to salvation. Of course there can be nothing more important than that for a Christian parent.
But too many people rely on what their parents believed and how they were raised. I suppose the medium here lies in teaching them what you believe and know and then teaching them to teach themselves. Thankfully I've got a while before this becomes a tangiable issue in our home. Lord willing much wisdom will come to us as parents before we have to tackle this one.

Number two has to do with spoiling our son. I think people have a quick trigger with that word. We've heard already that our son is spoiled. I think mostly that's said in jest, but as a new parent you get a bit gunshy around that term. No one wants a spoiled baby. Because spoiled babies become spoiled toddlers, spoiled toddlers make spoiled kids, and spoiled kids make for big headaches.
But here's the question. Is there a difference between spoiling and loving? I think there is. Now obviously there is more than one type of spoiling. I'm not referring to lavishing your kids with gifts and unmerited priveleges around every corner. Nor am I referring to refusing to discipline your child to the point that he/she literally runs the home.
I mean the spoiling that comes when your child can only be soothed by you. When they only want to be held by you and they throw fits (fits, not fussing) when they don't get their way. To an extent, every child does that. So where does that line exist? Does that line exist at all? We love our son, and we're going to cuddle with him, kiss him, play with him, and soothe him when he's upset. So how is that spoiling? Are we somehow ruining him for life because he knows his parents love him and are there for him? I see a big difference between loving and spoiling. I wish more people saw it that way and we wouldn't be so quick to label other kids as spoiled.

Just a couple random thoughts from me.

Walker, Kentucky Ranger

Walkers are not recommended by the world of pediatrics. I can’t understand that. Ok, so they can tip over and cause injury. I get that. I also get that the biggest reason for that is people sticking their children in a walker then paying no attention to them. We are not like those parents.

So our son is in his Pooh themed walker. Basically, we’re putting him in there so he can occupy himself without climbing over every inch of furniture while we try to eat dinner. Again, we’re watching him. But we’re eating too.

Here’s another observation of babies. Their first movements are apparently always backwards. Which makes sense. It’s easier to push backwards than to pull forward. When our son was learning to crawl, all he did was push himself backwards. Now in his walker, it’s the same thing. He can only go in reverse. That makes him very angry when he’s trying to get closer to Momma and Dada.

COLD UPDATE: Still there. Not as bad, but it’s still there. So the nose cleansing is still going on. And he still hates said nose cleansing. This morning, after finishing his breakfast (so to speak) he was crawling around on the bed when he coughed a couple times then launched spitup all over Dada like I was Will Smith in Men in Black. (“Aww, you know he’s actually kind of cu…{BLECH!!!}”)

Landmark

I forgot the camera this morning, so forgive the lack of pictures.

Last night we reached a parenting landmark. For the first time since his birth on November 14th, our son slept in his crib in his room. He's been in a bassinet in our room all this time. My wife, who is remarkable in a million ways, was very strong. I know it hurt her to not have him in our room. And it hurts me a bit too, but its part of the process.

What my wife has in character she lacks in physical size. She's just under 5 feet tall. So the latest hurdle she's had to clear as a first time parent is how to get our son in the crib without chucking him over like a Scottish log toss (see below.)

But she managed to get him in there. He woke up a couple times, but got back to sleep quickly. All in all, it was a success. It just may not feel like one.

The Necessary Evil

Caring for your baby is not all fun and games. There are evil things you will be forced to do. Taking a rectal temperature for one. But today we'll discuss one with which I've become far too familiar. The Bulb Syringe.

Let me explain pictorially.

This:

Plus this:

Equals this:

Understand? It's not always a bad thing, but when you put that rubber torture device into a red, sore, snotty nose you get pain. And babies don't like pain.

How Did We Get Here?

I can’t pinpoint the exact moment where my son became a Mama’s Boy. I’ve retraced our 8+ months of history, and I honestly can’t say when it happened. Perhaps it was a slow progression. But somewhere along the line the boy has decided that in moments as mundane as playing in the living room floor to moments as traumatic as fighting this most recent cold, he would rather have Mama than Dada.

I can’t say how I feel about this exactly. There’s the sensible, rational part of me who realizes that it’s quite natural for young boys to develop an affinity for their mothers. But then there’s the selfish, emotional part of me that is saddened by it and wonders what I could have done differently.

Rationally I realize there’s not much I could have done. I’m a pretty good Dad. I’m fun, I take care of him, I play with him, cuddle him, hug him and kiss him. I do most all the things that his mother does. I just don’t do them like she does, apparently.

It was a fascinating thing to watch happen. My wife is a devoted and excellent mother, so you can't blame the boy for "picking" her. But the whole time I kept watching him desire her comfort and presence more and I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt a bit.

So chalk up one more cliché as being true. Mama’s Boys and (hopefully, someday) Daddy’s Girls. Now excuse me while I wallow in my own self pity.

Snotty Again

Last night I witnessed the fastest onset of a cold that I've ever seen. My son was perfectly healthy and happy when I got home at 5:30 PM.

By the time he ate his nighttime cereal, he had a runny nose. 7:30 PM.

He went to bed and then woke up around 9:00 PM with his nose almost completely stopped up. The poor guy slept in about one and a half hour segments all night long. Thus, his mother and I slept in one and a half hour segments as well.

Near 4AM my wife offered to let me sleep in the other room so I could get some sleep before going to work. I declined at first, but changed my mind pretty quickly.

She's at home with the poor thing today. A little medicine here, some rest there and you just hope he gets over it soon.

CATCHING YOU UP
Our son has cut his fourth tooth. This one was a real lulu. It's an incisor and I didn't think it would ever make it out. But it finally did last week. To the delight of both parents.

Crawling is fun for him now. He will usually wear a smile as soon as he gets up on hands and knees. Chasing the cat is an olympic sport as far as he's concerned.

The time is drawing near to put him in his own room. Since he was born he has slept with us in our room. Not in our bed, as we wouldn't allow ourselves to become "those parents." He's been in his bassinette. I think this weekend we'll make the switch to the crib we paid a lot of money for that needs to be used to justify its existence before Daddy goes insane.